'BEFORE THE DAWN' - THE STORY

Say... talking blues? (courtesy of Zander Nyrond)

Long long ago in a distant land
A bold defender made a gallant stand
Against invading forces in a lonely tower
Guess that was his darkest hour...

(With great power comes great power bills. Where was the Watcher in the dark? I don't know, but I felt for him.)

And so begins Before The Dawn,
And before you all sit back and yawn,
I'll tell you there's a lot to learn
From how he died and the tower burned...

(Like: Real Watchmen Don't Use Lanterns. Get some night vision already!)

So now he's dead here comes the Prince,
He's badly wounded and it makes him wince.
He survived the slaughter of his kith and kin,
Now the old king's out and the warlord's in...

(Hail to the new boss. Worse than the old boss.)

But there's a wheel within a wheel.
See, the Warlord made a sneaky deal
With the reiver priests to get his desire.
Guess we know what lights his fire...

(No, it isn't fair. Life isn't fair. Cry me a reiver.)

Now in come characters by the score,
There's the Sage who's saddened by the war,
There's the vengeful girl and Mags the whore
And the Rumour-Monger, and many many more...

(Not available in stores. Send no money now.)

The reivers always pay in gold
But it doesn't make the streets less cold
For the Beggar Woman who doesn't care.
Her politics are laissez-faire...

(Don't ask, don't tell. Whoever you vote for, the Warlord still gets in.)

Now the Captain is a mercenary
But he's got a conscience, don't you see,
And he wants to do just what he ought
Though it's said an honest man stays bought.

(Penny for your thoughts? No, I said thoughts, not...oh well.)

The Rumour-Monger starts act two
Recapping what we've just gone through
And one new character now we bring;
The Warlord's daughter, who doesn't sing.

(She could read you some of her poetry, though...)

The Sage is angry with the Prince
'Cause too many people are getting minced
But the Captain says "Wise up, it's war!
Remember what they're dying for!"

(Uh, yeah...so that I can be king and live in comfort for the rest of my life. Way to make me feel better, big guy.)

We're gonna skip a long bit here
Where the Prince comes up with a great idea
To save the land without shedding gore--
'Cause hey, that's boring! WE WANT WAR!

(I mean, seriously. What would Lord of the Rings have been without all those neat battles? GO THE SKATEBOARDING ELF!)

So at the ruined tower they stand
The Prince and his courageous band
And the Warlord and his reiver priests
You know what happens then, at least...

(The Prince? Does nothing. The Sage? Betrays his principles. The reivers? Get burned by their own fire. The Warlord? Lets someone within two feet of him with a weapon. Your basic fantasy showdown, in fact.)

So now the story's at an end,
And I'll tell you one true thing, my friend,
Although the road was hard and long
It's worth it to hear all these songs...

(And at the end, you can say to yourself; Well, now at least I know--ooh, about a third of what it was all about. Watch for the extended edition. Coming next November.)